Off the market

Well, I'm going to have to change my blurb about this blog soon. I am now engaged. :-) I'll have to change it to a "thirty-something newlywed" or a "thirty-something engaged girl" or something. Anyways. Billy knows me so well. He proposed on the same stage where we met three years ago. We had our final dress rehearsal for "Twelfth Night" (I'm directing and in it), and yesterday also happened to by my birthday. At the end of the show, at curtain call practice, he came out with a bag. Everyone started singing happy birthday, and I opened the package - it was a hollow book. I opened that and found another wrapped package. I opened that and it was another hollow book. This went on a few times until I found the ring. He dropped down on one knee and said, "Erica _____ _____, take pity on my poor soul and be my wife." Then much cheering and clapping - and photo taking! Our photographer friend was there to "take publicity photos" of our rehearsal - except he already did that and used the ruse of needing to take a few more. And he took about 100 of the whole engagement event. :-) And the ring - it's amazing. It's extremely non-traditional, has character, and will be a great legacy to bequeath. It's modeled after a Tudor rose - it has a red ruby center, 8 diamonds surrounding it in petals, and 4 emerald leaves. He knows me so well. Being engaged is bittersweet, as I am still mourning the loss of both my parents. My aunt (my mom's sister) died last week, and I gave a eulogy, which just opened up the grief again. At the viewing, my cousins created a slide show of my family, and I saw pictures of my mom with both of my cousins on my wedding day. That made me sad. My mom made everyone's wedding veils - both of my cousins, my sister, even my best friend. And I would not have one. I won't have a big, white wedding - most of my family is dead and it just seems so pointless. Instead, it will be a gathering for friends. We hope to have it in late winter/early spring (luckily we live in Texas, where sometimes we can wear shorts on Christmas), and it will be a large, fun barbecue. One of our friends will marry us, another will perform with his band, another will make our cake, etc. We'll drink out of mason jars and have a great time. I won't wear a white dress - but I will find a great one - and I'll splurge on shoes. I refuse to stress - I want to have fun. And luckily I have such a wonderful support system of friends - they can get me through it, for I know the tears will fall when I think about how I wish my parents could be there. My goal is to write more, to document this experience. I'm sure it'll be like a therapy for me. :-) Cheers!